My Shoes/Your Shoes

I believe in newness and the future. I believe in redemption. I believe in the power of the human spirit. I believe in love...and within God, we find the most love of all.

Today I am pensive, reflecting on things that I cannot change, nor want to. I believe it is good to do this ever so often, that we can truly say to ourselves that we are better for the choices we have made...as long as God is at the forefront.

Sometimes I believe that my fear ruled many of my decisions. Other times, it has been the wisdom of my years that lent me understanding and foresight. But even more often, God has stepped in and granted me a reprieve in order that I learn a valuable lesson.

Someone asked me a while ago if I ever regretted anything in my life. I said no, yet that was not entirely true. I do regret some things, yet I was fortunate that in those situations, I became a better person. The person I am today. And I love myself still, despite all that I have done. I cannot say that I can regret a thing that has given me valuable tools to use in my life and to pass on to those in my bloodline. Rather written or oral, this lessons are indeed purposeful and can serve to make others better. I know I am better for it.

It is also key that people make their own mistakes. I have made quite a few, and I am not angry about it at all. I realize in my most recent dilemma, I had reached a point where I felt completely hopeless. I can't hope to convey to anyone the dismay I felt, but I am thankful that I was able to go beyond it and find my way to God again. We all play the clown now and again...it was just that my turn had come.

No one can tell me that I am a bad person. I will not allow anyone to look at me cross, thinking that I have done such irreparable damage that I should be ashamed. No one is aware of the pain I have felt, nor could I tell anyone exactly how it held me prisoner for so long. But now that I am free, I want all to know that I am fine and my mind is with God. I will still stumble along the way, but the foundation is set. I am ready to move towards my goals. All of them.

It does not matter what anyone else thinks. God is my only judge. I will walk squarely away from anyone that assumes they know my plight. NO one knows. But if you would like to walk through the darkness with me, I will hold your hand, so you would know of my misery. You may be surprised to learn that I am no different than yourself.

God be with you all. My love extends to each and every person of God. I am but a man, think of me as such, and remember the shoes we wear differ.