Help

I am staying with a friend from work until I can leave for Illinois. So, I am in limbo now, figuratively homeless, hoping that God and I can meet the challenge of reshaping my life once again. Many of you know of my struggle, and have at least lent me your prayers. I thank and commend you for being true friends.

Tonight I was thinking it would be a good time to pray and talk with the Lord. It was an easy thought, given the situation. Yet and still, something remarkable happened. First, as I have said many times before, there is no such thing as coincidence. Second, this is just evidence of God's presence. I was feeling really nervous about my future, uncertain I had made the right choice. Skeptical of what had transpired over the past few days and my ultimate position, I reached for God for assurance.

I felt compelled to seek a Bible verse that would be perfect for my situation. Of course, I had no idea which. Psalms came to mind, but there are quite a few of those. Which one to pick? Well, the number 121 immediately came to mind and I pondered, "What would this one say? I bet it will be perfect for me..." True enough, it was right on target. I had no idea what to look for, but the Spirit of God moved me to the right choice because I trusted in Him. Definitely no coincidence here, God is SO good to give me an answer like this.


Psalm 121
A song of ascents.
1 I lift up my eyes to the hills—
where does my help come from?

2 My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

3 He will not let your foot slip—
he who watches over you will not slumber;

4 indeed, he who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.

5 The LORD watches over you—
the LORD is your shade at your right hand;

6 the sun will not harm you by day,
nor the moon by night.

7 The LORD will keep you from all harm—
he will watch over your life;

8 the LORD will watch over your coming and going
both now and forevermore.

Leaving: The Prodigal Son

"Follow the path that has heart. All roads lead to the same destination, but follow the path that has heart."

I read that yesterday, from a friend reminding me of who I am and where I've been. I recall reading those words years ago, before I left for Washington, in a book entitled The Teachings of Don Juan: A Yaqui Way of Knowledge. Those aren't the exact words, but they are close enough. I have mentioned this book quite a few times in my writings, because it had a significant impact on me. Seems I've been away for so long and my mind has been on so many things, that I just lose the focus of what it all means. I'm sure we all have episodes such as this.

I regret that I must leave here, putting behind me many wonderful and beautiful situations and experiences. It is shameful to have to do such at this time, but I have no other choice. The unfortunate times that have arisen make for difficult decisions, though I am no stranger to such. I look to God and follow a path that is intended for very few. Many who know God will acknowledge that if you don't listen to what He asks of you, He will make you listen one way or another. The prodigal son will return once more...

This time is of mourning and celebration; of decay and resurrection. I have much to do in the next year and I hope to God that I am able, for I feel some great things welling up in my spirit. I guess I find jubilation in that fact. God is good, you know?

Another friend reminded me that as we continue to do the same thing and expect different results, we should be dubbed insane. Doesn't that sound insane? Believe me, that's the perfect definition. It's time to celebrate the new, and get back to my roots in Illinois. God awaits.

If you are my friends and you read this, maybe you'll laugh. Maybe you'll have a bit of pity on me. Or maybe we won't be friends at all anymore. The only thing that really matters though is God and what He wants of me.


Let me keep this blog going, for real.